Damn it, Nintendo! Why do you have to get me sucked right back in to your gaming platform?

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With the release of the Switch, I have spent over 160 hours playing Zelda: Breath of the Wild. The only things I have literally not done in the game are finding all of the Korok seeds, completing all of the side quests, and upgrading all of the armor to 4 stars (I only have the amiibo armor left to fully upgrade and a couple of pieces like the Snowquill headpiece and the rubber armor).

Not only has Nintendo gotten $389 out of me on launch day for a Switch and copy of BOTW, but since then this is the damage that has occurred:
$69.99 pro controller
$49.99 elite backpack
$49.99 1-2, Switch
$49.99 Bomberman R
$9.99 glass screen protector
AMIIBOS (goddamn it) - 8-bit Link, OoT Link, Smash Bros Link, Windwaker Link and Zelda, Smash Bros Ganon, Wolf Link, Guardian, Bokoblin, BOTW Archer Link and Zelda... there might be more. Learned how to spoof the Sheikh amiibo as well. That’s well over $150 in Zelda themed amiibos... FML.

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After spending hundreds upon hundreds of dollars, you’d think I’ve had enough, right? Nope, now I’m wanting to get a damn New 3DS XL! Why? So I can play OoT and Majora’s Mask and Chrono Trigger and...

Wait a minute, shouldn’t this all be available on the Switch via the Virtual Console? I swear, Nintendo is stalling just to get people like me to be stupid and buy another platform and a slew of games and accessories. Not gonna fall for it Nintendo, just hurry up and get the VC out so you can take my money!